.ILoveEffaSyahirah.

Thursday, October 31, 2013

First time working as a banquet server but had a lot of fun. Cant deny that I do miss working with them although they were strict but other than that I don't want to quit at all. Furthermore i'm quite happy as we didn't have to touch any alcoholic drinks or pork or lard or any non-halal food & drinks. Two days working and I've already missed working there. It may sound like a simple job but it actually require upper body strength so I can train my hands as well. Step faham but its true uh. I met so many people there, mostly 16 years old as they had just ended their NLevels plus working with the seniors were awesome. Great experience. Kinda miss Fazira who taught me how to do this and that on my first day. Oh and I thought Fie was arrogant but I was wrong. Before that, goodbye Fairmont Hotel. Gonna miss you and you as the hotel is directly opposite to Raffles Hotel.

Eppachooluv
10:50 PM

Sunday, October 27, 2013

Sometimes you have to reflect on your mistakes too. You cant always blame me for everything. I'm trying to help you here but you didn't seem to appreciate at all. You used the wrong sentence. I didn't spoil your reputation. I did what you wanted me to do, I tried my best to ask for her number personally. If I were given a choice I would have just went to cw and find them myself but I didn't because I think about you too. I didn't want to make things worse and I think fb message is the best option since you refused to give me her number, asked me to get her number. Dapatkan her number sampai lobang cacing. You said that. How would the whole class know about it if someone didn't open his/her mouth about us? Its impossible for them to know about our problem as I didn't tell her via fb message. Its either you told one of your friends or they went bitching and slandered. Idk, what I'm absolutely sure is I didn't tell any one of them about you. Do you know why I wanted to clear your name? Because I care about you. I don't mind them judging me cause i'm not in that school but not for you. As your girlfriend, whats wrong if I'm trying to save you? Why don't you let me meet them and what exactly did they say about the message? Go read it first before assuming and accusing me like this. Why should you care what others say about you. Their mouth their problem. If they wants to bitch around go ahead. It has nothing got to do with you at all unless they made it into a serious matter. I do have haters. Everyone makes mistakes. The only advice is, read that message first. Because if you didn't want to do anything about it, I will.

Eppachooluv
2:13 PM

Saturday, October 26, 2013

SAVE MY NAME? You think just by talking you can save my name? You think this thing won't go spreading around to others? You already destroyed my name and my reputation. Its all because of you! Your problems! Your stupidity! And now I have to face the consequences of your actions? You've embarrassed me enough. Please realise how much of a burden you are to me! The only way to stop all of this from happening again is for you to get the fuck out of my life!! Me without u = PEACE.

So you tend to say things you didn't mean when you're angry. That still doesn't give you any excuse to blame my friends for your own bloody problems. Since you have this attitude that cannot be changed, sorry to say, i don't want to have anything to do with you anymore. I'm tired of handling this attitude of yours. And this things is definitely gonna happen again in the future. I'm not assuming. I'm TELLING you. The good thing is, its not gonna happen to me. I'm seeing someone else now fyi.

Eppachooluv
4:06 PM

Wait, before you accuse me let me tell you once again. I fb messaged your classmate not to tell her i'm sorry via fb but actually to tell her that I wanted to meet them. You told me to apologise to them face-to-face right? I am sincere and I did this because of you and I know it was my fault so I am responsible for my own actions. I gave her my number so that she can contact me and in that message, I told her if she mind giving me her number so that it's easier for me to contact her but, if she's not okay with it I don't mind. Did you even read that message before telling me i'm taking the shortest way out? If you still don't believe me, you can try and ask your classmate to show you the message. I'm not as coward to say sorry through internet. In the last two posts i said this clearly, i have no personal issues with anyone anymore. The last one was Nat that's all. I remembered okay how you described them. You told me they were those alim girls, and i imagined them as Suu Aqilah etc. Really, don't force yourself to believe me, it's up to you. Pasal group picture, go read my previous posts again. I will say things that i don't mean to say just to make you angry and to satisfy myself for criticising others. Take erna for example. Sometimes i said she's a burden but did i mean it? No. Since when i blamed your friends? It was all my fault. If you believe every single word i said that night you're wrong. Because i didn't think before i speak. I said what i feel like saying. Don't accuse me by taking the shortcut when you don't even know what's my plan if she doesn't want to meet me. If they don't wish to meet me, i will go cw straight and meet them. By now you should know my style, i will always have backup plans when it comes to these matters. I am aware of what i am doing. I really am. The reason why i did this for myself is because i know i accused them and criticising them so therefore i will find a way to meet them and the reason why i did this for you, because i want you to know that i'm sincere apologising to them and i want to save our relationship as i started everything. I know what i am doing. Doesn't mean i didn't type everything out you can accuse me as and when you like. I may be immature but i am trying my best to solve these problems. If there's a need for me to explain to those who knew about it already, tell me. I will explain to them that it wasn't your fault at all and i will clear your name so that they wont think negatively about you anymore. Don't say i'm world. I mean it. If you need me to come to cw i will. Give me a date. That's all i need. I will settle with the 5 of them separately.

Eppachooluv
9:13 AM

1. You and your stupid unreasonable jealousy have always been a burden to me.
2. The problem lies within you, but don't you ever fucking try to blame it on my friends when they did nothing wrong towards you.
3. If you think you're the only one hurt, think again. Try asking yourself whether you deserve every bit of the pain for causing pain to others.
4. I threw away the ring because due to your immature act, our 6 years anniversary is meaningless. I was disappointed to the core when it turns out that you haven't changed your immature attitude. You cheated my feelings. You cheated yours too.
5. Its just a fucking group picture for goodness sake and i'm not the only guy in the picture. Wtf is wrong with you?!
6. I didn't expect you to take the shortcut and coward way by facebook messaging my friend and thanks to you, the whole class already know about this. Thanks for embarrassing me. I really appreciate it.
7. As you can see in your previous post, you still don't get it, do you? You say that your willing to do all this for me. It clearly shows that you're doing things blindly and you don't have a fucking clue at all about what you're doing. If you're doing all of this for me, you can get lost. Seriously, get out of my life. Idiot, i want you to beg them for forgiveness because its the right thing to do lah asshole! You fucking accused them of things they didn't do and now you should fucking beg them for forgiveness. The fact that you say you're 'willing' to do all this for me already implies that you are being forced instead of you having the brains to think properly.
8. You can see for yourself how immature you are.
9. I'm sick and tired of you giving me so much trouble and stress due to the same old problems. Enough is enough. How many chances have i given u already?! I can't stand it anymore. I've had enough.
10. Don't try to play the victim when you know you're the problem.

Eppachooluv
1:16 AM

Friday, October 25, 2013

This time i have to be honest. I'm not going to hide it from you anymore. I'm going to be as honest as possible. It was my fault that we argued. No doubt i was damn rude, i admit my mistakes and i didnt think before i speak because i was too angry and i didnt mean what i said. Everything. You said to me before that you tend to say things that you don't mean it when you are mad, it's just to vent your anger on someone. I didnt text you for two days because i know you too well, i know you needed time to cool down to talk to me. I respect that. You yourself said as long as i didnt apologise to your friends, you will not forgive me. Eventhough it was only between us, our argument, why do you think i made an effort to fb message your classmate and asked her to meet me? Why did i do that when i can just ignore whatever you said although you told me i dont have to because i was just wasting my time as you're already getting tired of me? Have you ever questioned yourself why did i do these things? Its kinda stupid but why? Because of one short, simple, straightforward, three words answer. I love you. If you love someone deeply, you are willing to do anything for them. As for me, i dont mind embarrasing myself in front of them saying sorry for you. I really dont mind. I'm sincere doing this. All i asked was if you were still mad at me. Just a simple question. But what did i get back in return? Four messages full of vulgarities and criticism towards your own girlfriend. Especially when you said i've always been a burden to you. I was hurt, i really do. I swear. If someone you really love said that to you, tell me, will you feel hurt? You wont feel that way because all these while i didnt criticise you at all, even if i did i was just normal remarks. You will never feel how i feel like now. Heartbroken. I dont know if this is true but based on what i saw, i was disappointed in you last saturday. I saw your reaction when you saw the ring i gave you for our 6th anniversary. I was observing your reaction all along but i knew you didnt realise that. It was just a normal reaction, you looked as if you were already expecting something from me. Just a smile. And a thankyou. There are some other things which i want to say regarding the ring but i dont wish to say it here. All i can ever say is i am really upset. Do you know how hard it was for me to save that amount of money just to buy a couple ring for us? I'm really really gonna be honest. Have you had any idea why did i bought two rings instead of one when i already have one for myself? Reason is because i dont want you to feel demoralised and compare the price between the first and second ring. I remembered, we paid a total of $108 for the couple ring at Couple Lab but this time i paid $35 for our ring. I wanted to be fair and use the same ring with you. I wanted to purchase a new ring for you at Couple Lab but it was too expensive and i was short of money at that point of time and i decided to go to Jurong Point instead. Do you know why i bought a new ring for you? Because you lost our ring at the arcade. It happened right in front of my eyes. Since that day i promised myself, by hook or by crook i'm going to get it for you for our anniversary, and thats why i purposely said i didnt get for you anything the week before as i dont want to suspect anything. Maybe it was not as good as our first ring, maybe its more cheaper. But looking at your reaction getting the ring, i felt that all my efforts were gone to waste. In just four days, that ring is in the rubbish bin due to argument. I was really down. Afterall it wasnt about the ring. Its about us. You and me. I dont want us to argue again. I dont really mind you throwing our ring but i really hope you would forgive me for fb messaging your classmate. I didnt mean to get you into trouble nor did i want to embarrass you. I did all these for you but i didnt expect things would turn out this way instead. You're the only reason why i'm happy and i dont wish to leave you. If you could give me a chance, i will make full use of it. And please, tell me what i can do to make it up for you. I dont like it either looking at you cleaning up the mess i've created. If there's a need for me to go to cw and explain to your friends, i'm willing to. Once again, i am terribly sorry for what i've done that night and once again, i didnt mean every single thing i said. Truthfully it was just for me to vent my anger. I need you. I'm sorry. Please forgive me. Contact me asap.

Eppachooluv
7:18 PM

Thursday, October 24, 2013

Argued and it ended up talking about going to our own separate ways. Frankly speaking I don't like it if we talked about this matter. Before I elaborate more, I shall explain everything why I was mad yesterday. It all began like this. I know it was my first time I dyed my hair because I used to have virgin hair and you were used seeing me in black hair. Me too. I don't mind you teasing me about my new hair but you kept on being sarcastic all the way since we met. Tell me, will you like it if I make a big fuss about something that you're uncomfortable with? Will you get annoyed if I always say "Besok aku nyer turn dye uh." It's not that I don't like it, I felt that was quite cute of you to tease me. I decided to just kept mum about it because I didn't want to make things worse, I didn't want to spoil your day until you showed me your photo taken in the afternoon. I'm abit sensitive when it comes to Malay girls, I really do. But once you showed me that photo, I became mad because you already annoyed me and I saw that photo but I still didn't want to say anything because I know whatever that comes out from my mouth will not be positive words if I talked about it. It was until we alighted from the bus and once again, you started being sarcastic because I asked if my hair colour was too obvious. You continued and I cant take it anymore and so I let out my anger saying bad things about your classmates which of course I didn't mean it at all. To be honest it was just to make you feel angry and I am aware it was super rude of me to say those kind of remarks about them. I know that was too much but i really cant help it anymore to the extent we argued. Whatever i said yesterday, i hope you will not take it seriously because i tend to say things which i don't mean to say if i'm mad. Don't worry, i will apologise to them face-to-face saying i'm sorry for criticising them eventhough they were innocent. I will go to college west to meet them and settle this matter asap. As for you, take your time to cool down okay... I know you're still mad at me cause you thought history will repeat itself just like what happened between me and Nat, but honestly i don't have any personal issues with anyone. Just lepaskan geram so that i'll feel satisfied. As long i still love you, i will do anything even if it takes for me to get their numbers and apologise to them. I don't want to lose you, i really don't wish to. I hope our relationship wont ends here because of this.. I wont run away from my mistakes instead I will clean up the mess I've created.

Eppachooluv
9:58 PM

Saturday, October 19, 2013

Hi love, Happy 6th Anniversary! 191013. 6 years being your girlfriend. 6 years going through ups and downs together. No doubt we fought a lot and even argued over small little things. I am sorry if I've ever treated you like shit before this because I was blind to see someone who accepts me for who I am. I do have my flaws but you didn't gave up on us, instead you always gave me chances since I said I won't repeat my mistakes again. It didn't happen once, it happened a million times. I mean if it wasn't for you I wouldn't be who I am now. Thanks to you for not giving up advising me despite my stubborn-ness. Afterall all your efforts are paid off if you get what I mean. You're special, yknow that. Its because you are my bestboyfriend that makes me feel so comfortable whenever I am with you. I must admit, most of the time I may be rough towards you butttt, deep inside my heart I will always love you no matter what. That's my promise to you. To me you have too many positive things that I love about you. Kind, because you never fail to give me useful advices and helped me a lot eg. you helped me in Maths last year in money exchange (Buy & Sell). Understanding. You're the only person whom I know who's able to tolerate my prangai if I am having moodswings every month, you understand me too well to the extent you didn't say anything if I did give you problems. You didn't gave up on us easily. Despite what I've done towards you, you'll still stick to me until now. Ahhh idk la, I already lost my skills. Trust me, you're more than perfect to be my boyfriend and I'm blessed to have you in my life. Totally different from any other guys out there. No other words could describe how I feel now. The only thing I can say, i'm proud to call you my boyfriend. I tak pernah menyesal matair dgn u but i appreciate everything you've done for me. I really do. Thankyou sayang, you're the best man. One in a million, bestest guy I've known. Hope we'll last longer and longer and get married and start a new family with babies in the house. Iloveyousomuch. See you soon dear mwaaaah! :-*

Eppachooluv
12:03 AM

Friday, October 4, 2013

The time shows 0042 hrs. I guess you're already asleep because you didn't reply my whatsapp. Pity you lah sayang, I can see that you're super tired and went to sleep straight away once you reached home. But its alright, as long as you have enough sleep then i'm fine with it. Oh yes, 15 more days yay! I've already planned what to buy for you for our anniversary next two weeks but I won't tell you what is it. Haaa figure it out yourself k. I'll be fetching you tmr at school at 6pm and don't be surprised if i'm wearing my ite shirt. See you tmr dear! Goodnight. Loveyou!

Eppachooluv
12:49 AM

Thursday, October 3, 2013

I'm not kidding. I don't even have the time to joke around when it comes to this matter. Trust me, whatever i'm going to say is true. I'm sincere about it, really, from the bottom of my heart. Actually kan..... I have to admit that one of your pictures looked so fucking hot & handsome & cute & charming & whatever positive words you can use to describe your picture. I'm not kidding, I swear i'm not. Cair I tengok! If you're wondering which picture i'm referring to, it's this one.

Eppachooluv
11:21 PM

I broke my promise again. I told you I won't argue with you but I still did. I'm sorry btw but at least now you know why I was mad this afternoon and i'm glad we talked after that and I had fun talking to you non-stop when it comes to girls. Hahah. Nah see these pictures we took just now at college west.